Myth: The female libido is significantly weaker than the male libido

Women Like Sex is here to debunk that myth and examine its many — and profound — consequences. To name but a few: Physiological ignorance, racial and LGBTQ stereotypes, ageism, limited sex education, the purity/virginity movement, medical inequities, abortion laws and sexual assault.

The word “woman” in this context includes everyone who identifies as female, and while the issues we’ll examine are all very much global, the first season of WLS will focus almost exclusively on the U.S. — the only Western nation among the top 10 most dangerous countries in the world for women.

Back to the myth, which persists because we still teach children that “masculinity” equals hyper-sexuality and “femininity” means not admitting to liking sex, publicly and sometimes even to one’s self.

Yet as women across the sexual spectrum grow up, many realize that they indeed like sex as much as men do — sometimes more. In a perfect world, we shrug off the (mis)information we’ve absorbed and enjoy ourselves without inhibition. After all, even heterosexual women will have exponentially more recreational than procreative sex, given that without the help of science they can only get pregnant a couple of weeks out of the year (if they’re fertile).

In the real world, however, girls are often told to ignore, repress or fear their natural urges, yet still be desirable, but not too much. Being sexy is good, being sexual can bring on disgrace or violence. Life on this razor’s edge is exhausting, dangerous — and arbitrary. Female body parts that spark “uncontrollable” male impulses vary culturally, yet males seem to control themselves just fine on beaches where, in many parts of the world, everyone is virtually naked.

Most importantly, being defined in reaction to men — by science and medicine even — is the opposite of agency.

Even well-intentioned adults may teach their children that there are givers and takers in sex, rather than two equal partners. So confusion, ignorance and shame persist, as does the weaponization of sex and crime, based on cultural biases rather than facts. Thankfully, shifting social norms are leading to greater public discourse, and to changes in science and medicine.

It’s time to flip the script.

We don’t have to see something to believe it.
We have to believe it to see it.

That’s what any sociologist worth their salt will tell you. And what we see is based on the stories that shape the lives, societies and laws of the era we’re born into.

History is simply a collection of stories we used to tell ourselves, the naiveté of which often appalls or amuses us. Because humans are constantly replacing — disempowering — old information with the new. In one big, very (very) long game of telephone that inevitably makes us question, and change, our stories — ourselves.

In terms of female sexuality, its time for the minority to stop dictating the majority’s stories, which will require everyone across the gender spectrum to play along.

So please join me and consider sharing your story here.